‘Spicy and feminine art’, dat is wat kunstenaar LILO maakt. Zij laat zich inspireren door filosofie, psychologie, en emotionele en erotische intelligentie. Haar werk zal regelmatig te bewonderen zijn op Bedmanieren.nl. In deze reeks plaatsen we steeds één van haar gedichten en kunstwerken.
Ashamed
Yes, I have been faking,
when I was younger and insecure
Because I did not know
How to have an orgasm with a man
I did enjoy sex
But never got to climax…
My body would not let me,
Because I did not feel safe, emotionally
I thought something was wrong with me…
I wanted to please my partner
When he was doing his best
I was too ashamed to talk about it
So I faked… And felt awful about that
Now I know it was not my fault
I was growing up in a society
Where sex education is about
Diseases, pregnancy and biology
And not about feelings
And what it actually means to make love
A society that learns little girls
To be a “good girl”,
To please, to get or deserve love
To ignore or repress
Our bodily signals
A society that puts so much pressure
On women to look good and be pretty
So, that even during sex
They worry about their body
Looking good in certain positions
Instead of enjoying themselves
And being able to feel worthy
Of feeling pleasure, receiving love
I’m so done with that
Every human being deserves
To be able to enjoy pleasure
And feel good in his/her body
Without being ashamed of it
And every couple deserves
To get rid of shame.
Shameless vulnerability.
To be able to have deep intimacy
Real conversations about insecurities
And what gives them pleasure
And honesty
To make their (sex)life better